Geroni-no

We weren't even 24 hours clear of Don Draper showing his kids the whorehouse where he grew up when the latest Internet theory about Mad Men hit the ether: Don Draper is D.B. Cooper. And while this is much more cogent than all of the Megan Draper as Sharon Tate nonsense, how likely is it that Don will end the series by going into free-fall over the Pacific Northwest? Let's unpack this theory.

All of the airplane imagery points to this. Yes, airplanes feature prominently in the show. But this is also the period where air travel began to open to the masses, and you see the start of the growth curve in air operations.The 1950s and '60s also saw double digit growth in US commercial aviation. As mentioned on the show, having an airline in one's portfolio, even a regional airline like Mohawk, was second only to a car company in terms of profitability and status. It would be unusual if an airline didn't figure prominently in the show.

Air imagery in other areas worked to drive other plot points. Having Pete's father die in the American Airlines Flight 1 sets up a decade of failure for Pete. Ted Chaough's plane gives him a form of power over Don (remember how nervous Don was during their flight) and furthers Ted's relationship with Peggy when they're socked in during a visit to Ocean Spray. And North American Aviation served as a wedge between Pete and Don due the background check Don would need.

I'm thinking all of this is selection bias. If you want Don to be D. B. Cooper, you're going to start seeing planes everywhere, and give them more significance than intended.

Did this season really mirror the first season? Critical to this theory is that this past season brought characters back to season 1, and as season 2 started with the AA1 crash, this final season would also include a historically pertinent airline-related story line. I think there is something to this season sending characters towards their origin, but with a significant difference:

• Don is cheating on his increasingly restless young wife, but with Megan the cheating isn't serial (as far as we know it's limited to Sylvia), and her restlessness is as much about her career than it is about her marriage.
• Peggy's feeling for Ted are much deeper that what she had for Pete, and has now become incredibly relevant at work as she's the highest ranking creative person in New York (for now, at least)
• Joan has more real power at work as a partner, but has less influence based on the open secret of how she earned her partnership and on her stagnant career path (compare her position to Peggy's).
• Pete's knowledge of Bob's identity has done more to actively hurt him than his knowledge of Don's identity. By not exposing Bob, Pete lost the Chevy account, lost his mother to Bob's partner in crime, and is heading to California in whatever counts for shame in his head.
• Betty looks like her old self, but now has a protector-husband in Henry, enjoys the glamor of being a politician's wife, and is even Sally's preferred parent.
• Duck Phillips is "around," but is unlikely to still be around once a new creative person is installed at SC&P. His initial meeting with Pete makes it clear that his work as a headhunter fits him better than advertising ever did.
• The agency is Sterling Cooper & Partners. And the partners may be making all the difference here. If it were just up to Roger and Bert, they may have found a way to keep Don on board in the wake of the Hershey's pitch. But you throw in Pete (who has never liked Don), Joan (who is likely still angry with Don for firing Jaguar), Cutler (who was suggesting a coup back when Don and Roger were in California), and Ted (whose relationship with Don is, at best, rocky), and Don's ouster is much easier to rationalize.

Where this leaves Don, then, is back before we ever met him, Don Draper the unemployed. And instead of trying to burnish his Draper persona to make it more real, he's opening up about his past and potentially creating something new. What we have in this list (and with Don in his new open about his past persona), is a 2.0 version of the characters and institutions that frame the show.

The shedding of Don Draper. There's the idea that Don has been shedding his assumed identity since Anna's death in season four, and there's something to that. He was up front with Megan about who he was, and he's made references to growing up on a farm and in Pennsylvania. But it could be that the shedding and the death references - from the Royal Hawaiian ad to Don winding up in that pool in the Hollywood hills - were showing Don where he was heading if he did not open up. Which leads to...

The two Don Drapers print ad. My interpretation of the ad, then, is that the Don with his back to us is the Don we've seen up to now, protecting his fake identity and heading the "one way" that path leads (to the cops who are arresting him, or waiting for someone to claim his body after he jumps from his apartment balcony?). The Don that's facing us is looking askance at that Don, and is being led in a different direction by the woman whose hand he's holding. It could be Megan leading Don to California (by way of separation and firing), Sally leading Don to be more open about his past, Betty leading Don to realize his emotional deficits, or even Joan leading Don to realize that his impulsive decisions cause more harm than good (I'd list a Peggy variant here, but Peggy would only wear something that sheer for Ted). The ad, then, rather than showing a Don who is disappearing, is showing a Don who is taking a different path (or is showing Don 1.0 disappearing to allow Don 2.0 to emerge).

But Don looks like D. B. Cooper! And acts like him! Well, they do dress similarly, and both keep their hair slicked, but it's hardly an unusual look for the period. And I really don't think the Cooper sketch looks much like Don at all. As for how the two men act, based on the accounts of the skyjacking both are cool under pressure. But is it enough to get Don to skyjack a plane? It seems like a bridge too far. Also, would Don ever cut his bourbon with soda? In any case, whatever similarities the two men have, I think there's still a major obstacle to this theory.

The Cooper skyjacking took place in 1971. While I don't think it's a stated parameter, Mad Men is about the '60s. It starts in March 1960 and uses historical events to anchor the timeline or directly influence the plot. Jumping into the 1970s would be a disruptive narrative shift out of tone with the rest of the series. It's much more likely that the series would tie its end to something like Altamont, the concert whose violence and disorder is informally considered the end of the '60s. But even if we overlook this, there would still be a lingering question.

Why would Don hijack an airplane? The piece suggests that both Don and Cooper exist in an isolated emotional state, and that both need to do something dramatic just to feel something. That's possible (though it's a complete assumption with regards to Cooper, and suggest a deeper void in Don than we've seen), but it would completely go against Don's nature to disappear in such a public fashion. He's much more likely to take a cue from his Royal Hawaiian poster and disappear into the sea, literally or figuratively. Assuming he's cashed out of his partnership, he'd have enough money to live on if he chose to disappear for good.

We have no idea what sort of Don Draper - if any - we're going to wind up with at the end of Mad Men, but I think the signs point more towards Don 2.0, a synthesis of Dick Whitman and Don Draper whose ultimate disposition will be written in this final season.

Three Up, Three Down: Mad Men, "In Care Of"

Three Up

1. Ted Chaough. Ted finally makes the leap with Peggy, showing up at her place after she comes home from a date, confessing his feelings and winding up in bed. Peggy talks him into going home afterwards (he apparently always goes home when he works late), saying she's willing to wait for Ted as he figures out how to best end things at home. But when he gets in bed with Nan you can see the realization that he can't leave. Ted basically begs Don to let Ted go to California, and while Don says he needs the move as badly as Ted does, but Don later relents and says Ted should go (not that Don has much of a choice, as we'll see). Ted gets a lot of anger from Peggy, but in the end he's doing the right thing, getting out of a situation that he knows will hurt more people than help.

2. Peggy Olsen. Peggy forces the issue with Ted by getting dolled up for a date and then making sure he sees her before she leaves (Peggy adjusting her dress to show more cleavage may be the least Peggy Olsen-thing I've ever seen her do). Her protestations to Ted about not wanting to be "that woman" in his marriage belie the fact that she wants him and is willing to wait for him to become free, and her anger towards Ted when he says he's going to California is palpable. But after Don gets the boot, she winds up in his office going over work. It's not officially her office, but Peggy is staking claim to it and a new level of importance in the New York office. Even if the guy Duck brings is becomes her nominal boss, Peggy's going to be an integral part of the firm going forward.

3. Bob Benson. Bob shows he can give as well as he gets by ending Pete's tenure with Chevy almost as soon as it starts. Knowing that the apparent death of Pete's mom will put Bob under even more pressure, Bob uses the Chevy guys' love of their cars against Pete, whose driving acumen is limited at best. With Pete now shuffling off to California, and Ken unlikely to take Chevy back, Bob is in position to be the top guy on Chevy. On the personal front, he's also managing to be the main man in Joan's life, even if she only refers to Bob as a buddy. Bob's the one carving turkey on Thanksgiving, and he's not letting Roger scare him off. Curious to see how all this plays out; will Duck give his info on Bob to other people at SC&P, and is Bob sincerely interested in Joan?

Honorable Mention: Sally Draper. Things are not going well for Sally at Miss Porter's, as she gets suspended after buying beer for classmates and getting drunk. So she'll be home for Thanksgiving, on top of which she has a summons to give a statement over the burglary case (her phone call with Don over this is, at best, frosty). But things might be in for a change when Sally sees the dilapidated house where Don grew up. As the first thing Don has really told Sally (or any of the kids) about his life, you can begin to see the wheels working in Sally's head, as to why her dad is hiding stuff about his past. Not sure if he'll make a full confession, but it's at least an opening for Sally if she wants to rebuild her relationship with Don.


Three Down

 1. Pete Campbell. Pete, now on the Chevy account, learns just before a trip out to Detroit that his mother has gone missing at sea, falling overboard during a cruise with Manolo, whom she married on board. Pete and Bud have a chance to pay for an investigation that will almost certainly see Manolo found guilty, though they apparently have a price at which they'll let things lie. Pete uses this to continue his threats towards Bob, which Bob deftly turns around by having Pete try to drive a Camaro in front of the Chevy guys. Pete promptly backs into a display and is off the account. In the end Pete winds up going out to California to set up SC&P's Los Angeles office, either free of his burdens or abandoning his family depending on your point of view.

2. Megan Draper. After an entire season where she tries to get Don back, she finally gives up trying after he tells her they're not moving to California. He doesn't explain it well, and his attempt to soften the blow by trying redefine their union as "bicoastal" doesn't cut it. So she's lost her husband and her job, and is moving to L.A. mostly on the hope of getting work.

3. Roger Sterling. There are some good moments for Roger - he gets invited to Joan's for Thanksgiving, giving him some time with their son, but he's only there because his daughter has frozen him out as he won't put any more money in her husband's trucking business. He also gets to have it out with Bob over Joan, but his attempts to intimidate Bob don't quite work as Bob winds up at Joan's for Thanksgiving as well. And he also has to be in on Don's ouster, choosing the business over friendship (though their friendship has never really fully come back from the falling out a few seasons ago).

Honorable Mention: Dorothy Campbell. She may have loved the sea, but she probably loved being not dead better. Or at least assumed dead; I would love it if she turned up next season after wandering around Martinique for six months or so with no idea of who she is or what happened.

One ?

1. Don Draper. So how is it that you can wind up in the drunk tank, lose your wife, and lose your job, and not have it turn out to be a down episode? It happens when the things that lead to these setbacks may, in the long run, be the best thing for you. Not so much the drunk tank - as much as it gives Don another clue that he needs to cut of the sauce, it also opens him up to being discovered for who he really is - but the rest of it.  During a pitch to Hershey's that is going quite well, Don comes clean with them about his personal story (which he wove into his pitch), telling all assembled about his actual childhood. This goes over about as well as you'd expect, and in its immediate aftermath is when Don tells Ted he can go to California (an act that causes him to lose Megan). In some respect, Don sacrifices himself to prevent Ted from going down the same road that Don's traveled.

When Don loses his job, it's ironic that he gets Fred Rumsoned for something he did when not drunk (he had that drink beforehand, but I don't believe he was actually drunk for the pitch). And as mad as Don was for being ousted, it does help give him the freedom that someone like Pete only thinks he's getting.

And when we see Don bring the kids to the house where he grew up, and we see Sally look at Don in a way that's questioning and a little understanding, we begin to see that for all of the trouble opening up has caused Don, it's also starting to give him back his family. It will be interesting to see how far his opening up will take him.

Three Up, Three Down: Mad Men, "The Quality of Mercy"

Three Up

1. Sally Draper. Turns out that part of Sally's processing of catching Don with Sylvia Rosen is that she now wants to go to boarding school, apparently an extension of her blowing off weekends in the city. Betty takes her to an interview and overnight at Miss Porter's School, where Sally is saddled with two students who demand smokes or booze to ensure they say good things about Sally. She has neither, but is able to call in Glenn Bishop and a friend of his, and they bring booze and weed. There's a bump in the road when Glenn's pal Rollo tries to move in on Sally, but she gets Glenn to intercede, which he does buy beating Rollo about the head and torso (which makes Sally very happy, not sure if it's because she likes Glenn or likes that she can manipulate him). In any case, it turns out that Sally's in if she wants, and in the end Betty even lets Sally try a cigarette, which leads Sally to note that Don has never given her anything. So even with the win, there's still a pretty big hole there.

2. Pete Campbell. Pete finally gets his shot at Chevy, taking over for Ken after his latest injury at the hands of the GM guys in Detroit. Problem is that he's saddled with Bob Benson, but Pete has a stroke of genius: he calls Duck to see if he can find a spot for Bob at another firm (and with good timing, as Pete's mom is still seeing Manolo). Duck passes on some interesting info on Bob, which Pete (using his experience with Don as a guide) uses to keep Bob around, but out of Pete's business (so to speak). He also gets Manolo out of the picture. He's still Pete at times, but it's a good week for him, relatively.

3. Betty Francis. Her phone call to Don about Sally shows some of the flirty aftermath of Don and Betty's hook up, which is a nice softening of Betty's usual bitchiness. She's very good with the woman at Miss Porter's School, and when she learns that Sally is in is reasonably proud (though she wants more details from Sally). Betty is surprised when Sally says Don has never given her anything, but I think there's some part of her that's happy to hear that Sally's giving attitude in equal amounts.

Honorable Mention: Ken Cosgrove. Odd to be considered a winner when you've been shot in the face, but getting out of traveling to Detroit while staying on the account in New York makes this an overall win (especially if Ken gets to keep that eye that's under the patch).

Three Down

1. Ted Chaough. Ted's interest in Peggy is obvious to pretty much everyone, as she can do no wrong when pitching ideas. They also take in Rosemary's Baby together, though an awkward encounter with Don and Megan (who are at the same theater) leads to an even more awkward explanation of why Ted and Peggy are at the movie (they claim it's for an ad, which is true enough for cover). When Ted plans to spend three times the approved budget on a TV ad (putting the firm's money on the line, as he's not yet run the extra cost by the client), Don gets involved by making a (not particularly) oblique reference to Ted and Peggy when trying to explain the extra money. When Don comes up with a different reason, it spares Ted (and gets him more money), but in the end Ted is furious with Don for outing him and Peggy. Oh, and Ted also gets to yell at Don when it turns out the firm is going to go with Sunkist, forcing them to drop Ocean Spray (Harry Crane is involved, but the money is also too good to pass up).

2. Don Draper. Don's been guilt drinking, and actually agrees to stay home when Megan notes his deplorable condition. That's when he hears from Harry about Sunkist, which Don tells Harry to cancel, but changes his mind when he begins to see how Ted is around Peggy. This winds up being Don's main issue for the episode, cock-blocking Ted by bringing in Sunkist and ratting Ted out about the over-budget TV ad. In the end he tells Ted off and says he's not thinking clearly, but it's clear that Don's actions are not coming solely from concern for the firm. As bad as Ted takes it Peggy takes it worse, as she sees it as Don's continuing war with Ted and his continued meddling with Peggy. If you want to be charitable, you could argue that Don is doing this to keep Ted from making the same mistakes Don has made, but I don't think Don would act like that. In the end, Don winds up curled up on his office couch, probably reflecting on how screwed up things are for him at home and at work.

3. Bob Benson. Bob gets assigned to Pete as part of his Chevy team, and while Pete tells him to keep his distance it looks like Bob will do the Bob thing. Or at least he would if Duck hadn't discovered that Bob's story - education, work, family - is all crap. The best that Duck can tell is that Bob is from West Virgina, was a manservant to a wheel at Brown Brothers Harriman, and has managed to get work only at places dumb enough to not ask many questions (hello, SC&P!). But Bob gets to stay on after Pete confronts him, and even with conditions it's a better deal than getting turfed out.  It's a setback in Bob's plan to do whatever it is he's planning to do.

Honorable Mention: Megan Draper. Remember when Betty said the worst way to get Don is to show that you love him? Megan tries very hard to get Don healthy and interested, but by the end of the episode Don is sitting in the dark living room, drinking and watching TV, rather than come to bed with Megan. She's getting closer to prove Betty right with every passing week.

Three Up, Three Down: The Killing, "Seventeen"

Three Up

1. Sarah Linden. Linden is back on the job, signed up by her old partner to help with the investigation into all of the bodies she found in that pond. She spends the episode looking for Kallie Leeds, and manages to do so without noticeably falling down the rat hole. Her search comes to fruition when a video of Kallie turns up in the stash of kiddie porn found at Goldie's place during a raid. While there's no guarantee she's still alive, the footage at least gives hope that Kallie is still alive.

Ray Emery

2. Steven Holder. Holder and Reddick are assigned to finding identities for the 17 bodies, but Holder focuses on finding Bullet. When he does she gives him the tip that Kallie may be locked up at Goldie's. The raid turns up Goldie and a stash of child porn, including the recording with Kallie mentioned earlier.  But there is a looming problem for Holder - he may be falling down the rat hole instead of Linden, spending all of his time at the office and forgetting that he should do something on Valentine's Day for his girlfriend.

3. James Skinner. Skinner is heading up the investigation, and appears to be cool, composed and solidly professional. He's mindful of how bringing Linden in on the case may be problematic, both based on her history and on their history (though he was apparently unaware that his wife knew he and Linden were shagging). Problem: while watching Holder and Reddick interrogate Goldie, Skinner seems intent in pinning the 17 murders on him. Which suggests he may have been similarly intent on sending up Ray Emery.

Honorable Mention: Carl Reddick. It says as much about the show as it does Reddick that he gets mention for mostly doing his job.  We do get more insight as to why he's a good partner for Holder - their good cop/bad cop rap is polished, and Reddick does seem attuned to Holder's personal gaps (the Valentine's Day reminder, for example). Still, he's a 9 to 5er who may not see the eventual reunion of Linden and Holden coming.

Three Down

1. Goldie. So after attacking Bullet, Goldie gets busted after she rats him out for holding someone in his apartment that she believes is Kallie. It's not, but he's busted with child porn, so he's pretty much screwed, even without taking into account that he may get put on the hook for the 17 murders. He does make Holder and Reddick's stake out, and thus manages not to lead them to anything that would get him into more trouble, at least until the recording with Kallie turns up. Things are going to get worse for him, no question.


2. Bullet. Still hurting after being raped by Goldie, she pulls herself together to some extent, and then manages to point Holder in Goldie's direction saying she thinks he's got Kallie locked up in his apartment. It winds up being a different girl, but it does help Bullett get some revenge. It also may lead some of the other kids to think Bullet might be a rat. On the plus side, Bullet does get to have a couple of tender moments with Lyric, but both are tainted. One is cut short when Twitch shows up and says he's going out to see where the bodies were found, the other comes when they get to the pond, and see all of the locations where bodies were found marked off and lit. It's then that it hits home for Bullet and Lyric that their "dates" may have deadly consequences.

3. Ray Emery. I'm not sure what's going on with Ray. He manages to get someone to sneak in a razor blade for him (hidden in a bar of soap, so suggests it's a guard or other prison functionary), but when it appears he's going to use it against Becker (after goading him with a story about how Ray maimed Becker's brother in a prison riot a few years before), but doesn't get the chance. Ray finally uses the blade to remove a tattoo from his chest that commemorates the birth of his son. Not sure if that was the original intent, but for all of the talk about his son this episode, he may figure it's better to cut his son loose to protect him than to use the blade to hurt Becker for no obvious end.

Honorable Mention: Coroner. So he's got to examine 17 bodies (or at least perform some exams and review the others), assemble dental records for the victims that still had teeth, deal with parents who are hanging out in the hallway waiting to see if one of the victims is their daughter, and deal with Linden popping in asking questions looking to link the 17 dead with Emery's wife. Pretty sure this guy does not get paid enough.

Three Up, Three Down: Mad Men, "Favors"

Three Up

1. Betty Francis. Betty wins the week without appearing after the third minute of the episode. She forbids Sally from staying in a hotel on a Model UN trip. This leads Sally and a friend to stay with Don and Megan, and the repercussions of that, as we'll see, are a potential long-term boon for Betty.

2. Peggy Olsen. We don't often see Peggy played for comedy, but this week suggests that it should happen more often. On the home front, Peggy has a rat in her apartment, and when it appears it's in a trap but alive she calls Rizzo for help, even offering sex for his services (she even hints at a three-way with Rizzo and the woman who's with him when she calls). She eventually gets a cat. At work, she's still navigating her relationship with Ted, but more importantly has a very uncomfortable conversation with Pete's mom, who mistakes her for Trudy and then lets out that she's having sex with her nurse. Peggy's reactions, and the scene where she tells Pete, are priceless. She even offers Pete kindness by saying she doesn't pity him, and that she does know him best (even if part of that is kind of date rapey). Anyway, some needed relief given some of the other stuff.

3. Mitchell Rosen. His act of protest - sending his draft card back to the government - sees him classified as 1A, which is a bad thing when you've also dropped out of school. He's pretty lucky that his mom's lover works with a guy who was taught to fly by a brigadier general in the Air National Guard. Mitchell was pretty dismissive of Don when the first met - looking like The Man as Don does - but he's at least big enough to thank Don and offer a handshake (even if Al had to prompt him).

Honorable Mention: Roger Sterling. Not much of Roger in the episode, but he can juggle three oranges like nobody's business. 

Three Down

1. Sally Draper. So the only thing worse than seeing your parents have sex is seeing one of your parents having sex with someone not their wife. That's what happens when Sally sneaks into the Rosen's apartment to get a note her friend slid under the door telling Mitchell that Sally likes him. She does not take this well, and winds up locking herself in her room. Don offers a weak explanation - that Sylvia needed consoling given Mitchell's stiuation - that Sally doesn't buy at all. Between this and seeing Megan's mom fellating Roger, Sally should just stay in the burbs.

2. Don Draper. While he does a great service for Mitchell - regardless of his motivations - the great service he's doing for Sylvia when they get caught by Sally negates pretty much everything. He's lost Sally, possibly for good.  His burying the hatchet with Ted - dumping Sunkist for Ted's promise to talk to his flight teacher about Mitchell getting an Air National Guard spot - is also tainted, as Don doesn't even know they were in competition. His ham-handed discussion of how to get out of Vietnam during a dinner with GM didn't help, either. He'd have been the clear loser of the night if he hadn't scarred Sally for life.

3. Pete Campbell. While his job continues to be a problem - he sees the Sunkist versus Ocean Spray problem as being another personal attack on his standing in the firm - it's family that hits him hard this episode, what with his mother having sex with her nurse and then, when confronted, saying that Pete was always sour and unlovable, even as a child. And to wrap things up, when he talks with Bob Benson about how the nurse he referred is taking advantage, Bob gives a monologue about how it can't be wrong when someone finds a true love, and then presses his knee against Pete's. Pete doesn't recoil in terror as you might expect, but it's another blow.

Honorable Mention: Dorothy Campbell. Not only is she going to lose her lover, her insistence that she can manage herself as she has carfare and her address on paper is undercut by the fact that she can't remember her handbag. And with her outburst about Peter, she's pretty much destined for one of New York's less savory nursing homes.

Three Up, Three Down: The Killing, "That You Fear the Most"

Three Up

1, Steven Holder. Holder manages to hold on to the Kwon case, which pisses his partner off, especially when Holder seems interested in actually investigating the case and not just closing it. Holder still has the sense that there's a case here with a connection to the Emery case, even though Linden tries to keep the two unlinked. He's also run across a possible connection to the now-missing Kallie. We also get to meet Holder's girlfriend, and they have a nice chemistry. That bodes poorly, knowing this show.

2. Twitch. Lyric's boyfriend/pimp, he's an aspiring model/actor who is planning to leave for LA once his parole is over. His control over Lyric is pretty obvious, as she does what he says in terms of working or not working, even when he blows all of their money on an "investment" of hair dye (to give him a more model-like look, I guess). It's easy to see why Bullet doesn't like Twitch, as he's a manipulative git whose interest in Lyric is pretty much limited to what he can get out of her.

3. Regi Darnell. A short but effective appearance, as she discovers Linden reviewing the Emery case and tells her off. She sort of accepts that Linden is going to be Linden about this, but she's also very clear that she has no words to dissuade or support Linden at this point. You get the sense that Regi is close to being done with Linden, and that may be for the best for Regi and her wife.

Honorable Mention: Francis Becker. The senior guard at the unit holding Ray Emery, he gets to dress down an underling for allowing Emery to use the phone (which he uses to call Linden's old partner, inviting him to the hanging), sit outside of Emery's cell to read him the manual on hangings, and then move a new, chatty inmate (who apparently knows Emery) across the hall from Emery. All ball busting all the time, which I think is how Becker likes his work.

Three Down

1. Bullet. Kallie's disappearance has hit Bullet hard, and she spends most of the episode trying to track her down. She has a short and unproductive interaction with Kallie's mom (who doesn't care that her daughter is missing), and gets the business from Holder when she goes to the cops to see if Kallie was run in. Twitch suggests Kallie is with Goldie, a local low-life who Bullet had a run in with earlier. When she breaks into his place, Goldie jumps her and holds her at knife point and rapes her. Awful.

2. Ray Emery. Things start out well for him - he cons the younger guard into getting him phone time, and he seems to be enjoying the reading from the hanging manual. But when Linden shows up and displays one of Emery's son's paintings of the wood, he suddenly terminates their interview and is brooding for the rest of the episode (which isn't surprising given the ending). That he gets a new motor-mouth blockmate isn't helping.

3. Sarah Linden. Linden's doubts about Emery's guilt build, thanks to a visit to the crime scene and with Holder. She also visits her old partner, who says to let it go (the ex-partner's wife also tells her to never come by again, suggesting Linden and her partner were involved). Linden's visit to Emery, where she shows him his son's picture of trees, leads her to visit the son and discover he's drawing the trees again. This leads her to the actual trees, and in the trees a body of water that's apparently a dumping ground for bodies (all of whom I assume were nearly decapitated and have a finger broken post-mortem). Linden has already lost her boyfriend over this case (perhaps smart to get out early), and is poised to lose everyone and everything by getting back into the case that broke her.

Honorable Mention: Pastor Mike. He runs the shelter where most of the kids in the episode get food and occasionally stay over. He has what might be the most thankless job in the world, keeping track of street kids while trying to keep pimps and abusive family and exes away. It'll get worse during his inevitable period as a suspect.

Three Up, Three Down: The Killing, "The Jungle"

Another season of rain and murder!

Three Up

1. Steven Holder. It's been a year since the Larsen case wrapped, and in that time Holder's gone 7 for 7 with murder cases. His personal life seems to be back in order, too. So when his instincts tell him that the dead teenaged prostitute who just cropped up needs further investigation, he keeps with the case even after his new partner fobs it off on another similarly useless cop. Holder makes a connection to a case Linden mentioned during the Larsen case (the one with the boy who was locked in a closet with the victim - his mother - for a week). He visits Linden to see if there's something to this, but she says that killer is in prison, so no connection. It'll be interesting to see how much this new case (or cases) screws up the progress Holder's made over the last year.

2. Sarah Linden. Speaking of progress, Linden is now working for whatever branch of state government runs the ferries between the mainland and the Puget Sound islands. She now lives on one of them, apparently with a co-worker/boyfriend. She also seems to have her personal life back in order, running every day and keeping busy with a good, if low paying, job. But under that surface the old Linden still lurks, as we see when she retrieves the old case file that Holder asks for after he's gone, and when her toast at Regi's wedding becomes less about the couple and more about being true to herself. Her borderline, not always in control self. It's particularly Linden-like when, after discovering a sick cow during a run, she goes home, gets her gun, and puts the cow out of its misery, ignoring her boyfriend's question about the case file along the way. If the guy is smart, he'll start sleeping on the dock.

3. Jack Holder. He's back for Regi's wedding, and may have his life most in order, as he's living with his dad in Chicago and doing well at school, Still, he misses his mother, and asks her why she's still in Seattle when she could move to Chicago and see him more often. She doesn't have a good answer for that, shockingly.

Honorable Mention: Regi Darnell. She's married! To another woman! Hopefully their honeymoon won't be cut short by Regi having to intervene with Linden again. At least she won't have to be Jack's de facto foster parent.

Three Down

1. Ashley. Our victim, who did not go gentle into that goodnight. I don't think we ever got a last name for her, which is sadder still. Look for her rings (which were not present when her body was recovered) to play a significant role in the near future (more anon).

2. Ray Emery. The husband of the woman who was killed and father of the son locked in a closet with her corpse, Emery is now 30 days from execution, and doesn't look to be fighting it. In fact, his assault on a prison chaplain seems to be part of a plan to make his execution as notable as possible (he also wants a hanging rather than an injection, which is apparently an option in Washington). So I'm not sure he's a loser here - he seems to be getting what he wants - but he's pretty clearly going to die. Unless his letter to Linden (I'm assuming the Department of Corrections envelope she received is from him) helps stoke her belief that there was something off about his case...

3. Kallie Leeds. Kallie is one of a group of homeless teens that apparently included Ashley. Except she's not exactly homeless; her mom lives in the area, and she's able to go home, but her mother clearly doesn't want her there (she tells Kallie to her face that her birth was the worst thing to ever happen to her). So she's functionall homeless, and spends most of her time with Bullet, an abrasive (and very butch) girl of about the same age. Kallie doesn't have Bullet's problems - her mouth gets her in trouble, and she's got feelings for another girl who is with an older homeless teen - but the ride she takes at the end of the episode may very well be her last (based on the similarities between the way the first and last shots of the episode).

Honorable Mention: that cow. Linden comes across a (apparently abandoned) cattle shed during a run, and for all of the skeletons lying around manages to find one sick cow, which she later puts down. I'm just wondering how that cow managed to hang on when all of the other ones are long since dead. On the other hand, maybe I don't want to know.

Up Fronts, Rated

OK, I usually rank the up fronts right after they're done, but haven't felt compelled this year as no one blew me away with their excellence/crapulence. Still, might as well get it over with.

5. Fox. To be honest, I'm finding it hard to make distinct differences between everyone who isn't CBS. Fox has at least one show I'm interested in checking out (Brooklyn Nine Nine), but most of the new shows don't do much for me. They've also dedicated 1.5 nights a week to The X-Factor and American Idol, neither of which are doing the network any favors. More info on the return of 24 could have moved Fox out of the basement.

4. The CW. As with everything related to the netlet, this is kind of on the curve. I think their new shows (and programming in general) is aimed at the people they want, but that sort of focus doesn't really lead to growth.

3. ABC. They'd be lower if it wasn't for Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. And I'm not even a comic book fanboy. Also concerned that Monday might finally show signs of aging.

2. NBC. I'm a little surprised they're here, as I wasn't particularly overwhelmed with their new shows. Maybe I'm just sending them good vibes for renewing Community and Hannibal. And really, if I were to rewrite this a couple of hours from now I might have a completely different lineup here.

1. CBS. I'm not over the moon with their new shows, but the combination of known talent and strong returning shows puts them in the best position to succeed.

So there it is, for what it's worth.

Three Up, Three Down: Mad Men, "A Tale of Two Cities"

Three Up

1. Jim Cutler. With Don and Roger in L.A., and after an exchange with Ginsburg that's insubordinate at best, Cutler suggests to Chaough that's it time to get rid of some of the SCDP people and bring back some CGCers. Ted is resistant, but Cutler sets his sights on Bob Benson, sticking him with a meeting that winds up with the firm on review. As a "reward," Cutler puts Bob on Chevy, who have finally bought into the firm's plans for the new car. And in the end, Cutler gets to announce a name change to Sterling Cooper and Partners, which makes him look magnanimous for taking his name off of the firm.

2. Joan Harris. When a friend sets her up on a date, it turns out to have a very different purpose than what she thought - it's with an executive at Avon who is looking to boost sales. Joan handles the shift from the personal to the professional well, and tells Peggy about the potential client. Peggy goes to Ted, who puts Pete on it, cutting out Joan. But Joan snags it back by changing the meeting with Avon and not telling Pete. Peggy thinks that's a bad idea, and Pete things it's a horrible idea, between being cut out and how this violates the "fundamental rules" of accounts. Some quick subterfuge by Peggy gets Joan out of trouble, but puts her squarely on the hook for landing Avon as a client. It's a chance Joan's willing to take to finally get some stake in the firm that isn't based on her physical features.

3. Ted Chaough. Ted's against Cutler's "coup," looking to move forward rather than be divisive. His trip to Detroit bears fruit when Chevy accepts the firm's campaign strategy for their new car, which Ted even gets to see (if in clay only). This plays into Cutler's plans, but Ted either doesn't see that or is happy enough to have made progress to not care. He backs Joan over Pete on Avon based on the apparent connection Joan has with the Avon exec, and while that might subvert the normal order of things, it's likely the right move in a pragmatic sense.

Honorable Mention: the Ford Mustang. As much ire as it causes Don and Roger, the Mustang they get as a rental is pretty sweet. And underscores that whatever Chevy comes up with isn't going to match up.

Three Down

1. Pete Cambpell. The marginalization of Pete continues, between getting squeezed out on Avon to having the squeeze made permanent by Ted to not having his name on the firm. And when he's not blustering about these indignities, he's being smarmy and condescending (such as when he dismisses Joan from meeting with Avon before she cuts him out). And when no one but him seems to care that the merger has changed the business, he apparently decides that if you can't beat them, join them, by taking a joint off of Rizzo and taking a toke. It appears to be eye-opening to Pete from the first, but I'm going to be he's the type who gets paranoid high.

2. Don Draper. Don's cynicism over politics (he's less moved by the violence in Chicago than most, though he does seem sufficiently chagrined by it) and disdain for the rental (he's hoping no one from GM is in town) bleeds over to the meeting with Carnation, where his pitch to advertise their Instant Breakfast alongside cereal doesn't appear to gain traction. Harry takes him and Roger to a party where Don smokes hash, which makes him cotton-mouthed, prone to hallucination, and almost dead when he winds up in the pool. So kind of a bust of a week for Don, though he seems to be making some rapproachment with Megan.

3. Michael Ginsburg. The lack of a peace plank sets Ginzo off, most notably on Cutler, whom he calls a fascist (among other, even more charged things). Cutler does remind Ginzo that he seems OK with getting paid with money from Dow and other companies who produce war materiel, which apparently hits home later, as Ginzo has a full-blown freak out before meeting with Manischewitz. Benson is able to talk him down by using a lot of power of positive thinking-type jargon and a reminder of just who their client is. Ginzo was lucky not to be fired, and will likely walk that line (due to his personal connection to what war does to people) and the line of being in business with pro-war elements for some time.

Honorable Mention: hashish. As peaceful as the people smoking it seem to be, the hallucinations and near-death experience it gives Don isn't exactly an advertisement for its use. It makes the LSD trips we've seen before (and see in this episode in the persona of Lotus) seem benign by comparison.