New on TV: Merv Griffin's Crosswords

I caught this pretty much by accident last week (it's on during the dinner hour on the MyTV affiliate in New Hampshire), and it was interesting, if not particularly compelling.

A group of five contestants try to solve a crossword puzzle, with two contestants playing for money and three others acting as spoilers. If the spoiler gets a word correct, they can choose to replace one of the money contestants, who then moves to the spoiler's podium. So if you like marginal word games and lots of walking, this show is for you!

At the end, the player with the most money gets to play the bonus game, which is 90 seconds to complete the puzzle. It's enough time, though the rigamarole that the contestant has to go through for each word - say the clue number, host repeats, screen zooms in on word, host reads hint, player gives and spells answer, host verifies - there's a lot of time lost in process.

The big prize was a trip to Mexico, which harkens back to the great syndicated game shows of the 1980s. If only AMC were still around to give away Eagle station wagons to five-time champions.

So no, it's not a great show. It's better than the likes of Starface, though.

The South Shan't Rise Again

We have our first casualty of the new TV season, as Fox yanked Nashville after just two airings. Given its similarity in set-up to the youth-oriented Laguna Beach, I'm not sure why Fox put this show on Friday nights, when most of the young people are out doing stuff.

This is one of the shows I skipped over in the LaPlaca in favor of shows like Cane and Rules of Engagement, both of which did well in their season premiers this week. I am not going to do well this year.

New Season, New Losers?

As a new season gets into gear tonight, let's take a look at the shows whose demise I've predicted in the LaPlaca Open, ranked in order of bonus points I'll get if the show gets the axe:

10: Carpoolers - I've read nothing positive about this show, and the promos on ABC have not been helping. It also features Jerry O'Connell, who I don't exactly think of when it comes to comedy.

The one saving grace this show may have is that it's not up against any blockbusters. And if Cavemen manages to draw people in, it may survive as the bridge into Dancing With the Stars.

But I don't think so.

9: Moonlight - It's bascially Angel for the moms of that show's fans. That or this show about a LA vampire turned detective is just an amazing coincidence.

Fridays are pretty quiet to begin with, so I'm not sure how this will fare against the praised but lightly sampled Friday Night Lights or ABC's new female-centered line up of Women's Murder Club and Men in Trees.

8: New Amsterdam - more immortal crime fighters, but this time a NYC cop whose been living for hundreds of years. Fox pushed this back to mid-season, which suggests a lack of confidence and, hopefully, a mid-season burn off.

7: Lipstick Jungle - another mid-season pick, not sure why I went with it other than it seems awful late in the game to try to rip off Sex and the City. For now it looks like it's going to take the Sunday at 10 spot for NBC, which seems an odd replacement for Sunday Night Football.

6: Cavemen - I thought there was a rush to judgement on this show based on its genesis from Geico ads, but when the negative press continued based on early show reviews, I figured I'd jump in. Novelty may keep this afloat for a while, and I hope we don't have a repeat of Til Death where enough people watch to keep the show going until it finds itself.

5: Rules of Engagement - kind of desperation pick, really. I'm hoping it gets lost between Heroes and 24. I should have gone back and taken a shot at Notes From the Underbelly.

4: Scrubs - I didn't read that this was an official last season, so I got uck here. Just didn't rank it highly enough.

3: According to Jim - yes, I went back to the well. It can't live forever. Can it?

2: Cane - kind of counter-intuitive, given the growth in Hispanic programming, but reviews are pretty marginal, and I'm counting on the desire not to watch crap transcending ethnicity. It has to, otherwise we'd still be stuck with Freddie.

1: Chuck - a total guess here, based on what reviews I could find. Could work with Heroes, perhaps by cutting that show's bombast with some humor.

Popular picks I didn't make:

Viva Laughlin - really should have gone with it. The bizarre factor will only keep it on the air for so long.

K-Ville - I have hopes for this show, given that it's not set on either coast and has a cast whose diversity isn't the obvious by-product of a marketing team. I do worry that Fox will make it more about swamp boat chases and New Orleans atmosphere than anything else.

Samantha Who - passed because it had a couple of decent early reviews and it has a nice time slot - at least for the fall. It may fade when it starts sharing Monday with Wife Swap rather than Dancing With the Stars.

Life - a cop unjustly sent to prison uses his experience when he rejoins the force after being released. It does have a very tought time slot, as Wednesday at 10 already has CSI: New York and the new Dirty Sexy Money.

Nashville - given its tankalicious debut last week, a clear miss for me.

What I Watched On My Summer Vacation

With the new season around the corner, figured it was high time to, you know, post something.

My plans for the summer, TV-wise, was to catch up with the backlog of recorded programs. That hasn't gone quite as planned, as we're only now up to the final finale for The Apprentice and are a good three or four episodes remaining on our other regular shows (most recent shocking plot twist: Mrs. McCluskey has her hubby stashed in her basement freezer on Desperate Housewives).

What's been slowing us down is our real-time (or close to real-time) summer viewing. Lots of food-related programming here - Hell's Kitchen, Top Chef, Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares and Dinner: Impossible. The wife also worked through all 700 hours of So You Think You Can Dance, most of which I was spared by the new placement of the computer relative to the TV.

Nerd programming also slowed us down, as we got through Simon Schama's The Power of Art while we have several History Detectives waiting for eventual viewing. I have solo nerd duty for Eureka, which I think I've enjoyed more this season than last.

We've had to pass on most other summer offerings, including a short-lived attempt to record Damages for future viewing. Sorry, Glenn.

This summer has proved to me, more than any other, that there is no more off-season for TV. I may never catch up.

Curses! Foiled Again!

It's old news by now, but given the ratings for the show I'm sure many didn't notice that According to Jim got picked up by ABC for next season. This was kind of a surprise, especially as there was some thought that Courtney Thorne-Smith was leaving the show.

I stop to mention this here because, for the second time in my life, According to Jim has been a stumbling block for me in the LaPlaca TV dead pool. It's not that big of a deal this time around - ABC's renewal of both Men in Trees and Notes From the Underbelly did me in well beforehand - but it was a rather nasty parting shot from the Alphabet Network nonetheless.

It must be something about family-oriented sitcoms. The very first year of the pool my lone miss was Yes, Dear, while the following year I took Reba and my first pass at Jim. I won't get into the year where I bet heavily on longer-running shows (Drew Carey, Becker, and Friends) and took it on the chin.

In any case, I can guarantee that of the 10 shows I submit this year, According to Jim will not be among them. I clearly am not the man to bring Belushi down.

More fun: the show or the sniping?

You would have expected a TV blog to comment on the end of The Sopranos in a more timely fashion than I am, but my late entry into the topic is explained by a simple fact.

I've never watched a full episode of the show.

Two pretty simple reasons for this: one, I'm too cheap to get HBO, and two, I've not watched half of the DVDs I have now to take on a new show. That being said, I know tangentially about the show, but wasn't really in the same mode as many people when the last episode cut to black. And I'm really not in the same mode as those who have vented their spleen at the lack of "payoff" in the show's open-ended ending.

But I have enjoyed the griping, such as this discussion at TV Barn. And I've gotten to enjoy it for free, saving the untold hundreds of dollars I'd have spent on HBO over the run of the show. So I should at least thank David Chase for that.

I can't really say if I'd have been mad at this ending were I a fan, but I will say that I was disappointed with the Homicide movie that was made to wrap up that series. Perhaps there are some stories that aren't meant to end cleanly.

It worked?

Fan protests rarely bring back a show once cancelled, and the various histrionics used in the attempt are, at best, fun to watch. You'd think after the annual rite, fans of cancelled shows would get the hint and, rather than create Internet petitions, sit quietly and wait for the DVDs.

Don't expect that to happen any time soon, now that fans of Jericho have apparently convinced CBS to bring the show back on a limited basis next season.

I'll admit to being one of those people who got away from the show after its mid-season vacation, always planning to catch up with episodes on Comcast On Demand but never quite doing so. I don't feel like I've missed much, but with this announcement and a summer with mostly reruns, I figure I'll get back on board. The only question is will I fall back off between September and whenever the show actually returns?

Water Cooler Talking Points: Lost

1. BOOM! - the surprise plan against the Others only partially works, as Jin misses his target. Sayid, Bernard, and Jin are captured, and the Other in charge threatens to kill Jin unless someone fills the Others in. Bernard cracks, and tells them that Juliet and Carl had tipped them off, and that the main group is headed towards the radio tower. They radio to Ben, who upon learning all of this decides to cut off the castaways before they can reach the radio tower and send their distress signal. He takes Alex along, planning to cast her away with the others for her role in sending Carl as a warning.

2. Down the hatch - Charlie is getting slapped around and interrogated by the women in the Looking Glass, as they try to figure out what he's doing. He pretty much tells them, and as they argue in private Desmond come up through the moon pool, chased away from the canoe by Mikhail, who is shooting at him. Mikhail, for his part, is there to check on the situation, and is ordered by Ben to kill everyone. He only gets partway through when Desmond comes out of hiding and shoots a spear into his chest.

3. Meet you at the tower - Ben does cut the group off, and tries to convince Jack that he has to confiscate the satellite phone because everyone will die if Jack allows the rescue to happen. Jack says no, and Ben orders the deaths of Jin, Sayid, and Bernard. We hear three shots on the walkie. Jack beats the crap out of Ben, and goes back to the group.

4. Now I want a Sunkist - before Bonnie (one of the Looking Glass ladies) dies, she tells Charlie that the code to disable the jammer is set to the tune of "Good Vibrations" by the Beach Boys. Good thing he's a musician. He punches in the code while Desmond gathers diving equipment. Charlie is successful, and immediately a transmission comes in - from Penny! She learns that Desmond is there, even though Charlie doesn't know where they are. He does learn that the boat that Naomi came in on wasn't sent by Penny. That's about all they have time for, as Mikhail (who escaped through the moon pool) shows up at the porthole with a grenade. He blows the porthole open, and water rushes in. Charlie seals himself in the room, saving Desmond but killing himself - but not before he writes a warning on his hand that the boat isn't Penny's.

5. Back to the beach - Upon the failure of the beach surprise, Kate wants to go back to save their friends. She asks Sawyer to join her, but he passes and tells her not to go. Surprisingly, not soon after he tells Jack he's going back. Kate is annoyed, and then moreso when Juliet joins him. She says she can get guns from a cache on the way. She kisses Jack before leaving; Jack will shortly afterwards say that he didn't let Kate join them because he loves her. Nice mixed signals! Anyway, Hurley tries to join Sawyer and Juliet, but is rebuffed due to his size. Not to be dismissed, Hurley actually saves everyone by using the Dharma van he found to storm the beach and run over the Others. Good thing, too, as Juliet was lying about the guns.

6. We're saved? - Once Charlie shuts down the jammer, Naomi gets a signal on the phone. She dials, but doesn't get to do much else before she dies - from a knife thrown into her back by Locke! (Earlier, while in the pit, he finds a gun with which he's going to kill himself, given his wound and the returned paralysis in his legs. Before he can do that, he sees Walt(!), who tells John that he can't kill himself, as he has work to do.) Locke tells Jack pretty much the same thing that Ben said, but Jack isn't buying it. Someone finally picks up, confirms that they can lock in on the phone's signal, and rescue them all. Well, except for Locke, who slinks off into the woods, and Rousseau, who had said earlier that she wasn't leaving.

7. Flash-what? - throughout the episode we get flashbacks of Jack, who is bearded and rapidly falling apart. His descent begins (appropriately) when he's flying into LA on an Oceanic flight, and when given a newspaper instead of another drink, he learns that someone has died. He takes the news badly, and plans to jump from a bridge - but he winds up saving a woman and her son from a burning car wreck (which he kind of caused). We watch Jack get worse up to his going to the funeral for our unnamed corpse, and it turns out Jack was the only mourner. After several aborted calls during the flashes he finally talks to the person he wants, and sets up a meeting at the airport. Turns out he was calling Kate - and that the flashbacks are actually flash-forwards! Jack tells Kate that he's been using the free flights Oceanic gave the survivors, going to Asia or Australia every weekend in the hopes that the plane will crash and he'll get back to the island. He's now firmly on board with the idea that they weren't meant to leave when they did. She's less impressed, and tells Jack to move on. She then says she has to get back, as someone is expecting her. Not sure who that is, or who the dead person is (though Jack was surprised that Kate didn't go to the funeral, so it's clearly an island person).

I have to imagine that this is going to be a very different show when it comes back in January.

Finally, the Finale

A rather brisk American Idol final will give way, predictably, to a bloated results show tonight, but unlike the last couple of seasons, I don't think there's much predictability to who will win. I agree with Simon's end of show analysis that Jordan had the better night, but Blake had the best individual performance with his reprisal of "You Give Love a Bad Name." I won't go into the "official" song, a piece of light pop turd called "This is My Now" that sounds like something Dianne Warren would dislodge when she flosses. It's a perfect compliment to the other crappy "official" song.

That being said, I think Jordin is going to win. I'd not be particularly surprised if Blake won, but I don't see it happening. Jordin sings well enough to win the singing competition, and is personable enough to withstand the personality contest aspect of the show.

New on TV: National Bingo Night

I was prepared to hate National Bingo Night. And, in reality, it gave me plenty of reasons to hate it:

* The insufferable Aussie host, Ed Sanders. He CAN'T. STOP. YELLING.

* Awful editing, most notably in the whiplash-inducing jump cuts that seemed to crop up every 8 seconds or so.

* The continuation of the "stupid and hyperactive" school of contestants.

* The lack of forethought in trying to build suspense, such as when the host would talk about possible bingoes when, based on the numbers pulled, no one could be even one number away from a bingo.

* NBN "Commissioner" Sunil Narkar. At worst, he's a stereotype. At best, he's the commissioner but is also forced to be a referee and roam the crowd ruling on bingoes. Fay Vincent didn't even get treated this badly!

But it also gave me some reasons to like it:

* It's at least not the same glacial pace as NBC's game shows. This not only helps the hour move along, but it also helps the contestants seem less Ritalin-deprived than their NBC counterparts. At least on National Bingo Night, the screaming fits the overall tone of the show.

* The games were fairly interesting, though too convoluted. I'm thinking here of the game where the contestant had to guess if the ball coming down the chute had a red or black star on it. That was fine, but correct guesses correlated to some sort of wedding set up that the prop department spent at least five bucks to put together.

* NBN "Commissioner" Sunil Narkar, whose call of "no bingo" may be the closest we have to a catch phrase from the 2006-07 TV season. Which is sad.

Really, this seems like something Network 23 would have put on the air on an episode of Max Headroom. Actually, considering that that show was on ABC, they may have gotten the idea for the show from an unused script. It's a loud, obnoxious mess whose only reason for watching - to try to win prizes - is obviated by the ability to get winning numbers off of ABC's website after the show airs. Don't bother.

Upfronts: Fox

First, apologies for the delay on this. As hard as it is sometimes to follow Fox's scheduling, personal lethargy is mostly to blame.

What's gone? - no surprises here, really. If it was on hiatus, it's gone. We'll get some burn off this summer from Standoff, but that's about it.

What's back? - most everything returns in its normal place, although Fox is going to try to shift Bones to Friday again. It'll be on Wednesdays in the fall, but is scheduled to move to Fridays once American Idol returns. I'm thinking we'll see this move go the same way as last year's.

What's new for the fall? - we'll take this day by day.

On Monday we get K-Ville, a gritty cop drama set in post-Katrina New Orleans. Anthony Anderson stars, and apparently his character may be a little too pathological for some viewers. It'll be paired with Prison Break.

Tuesdays will lead off with New Amsterdam, which is about a New York City cop who is immortal. I don't know what they'll do with that hook outside of a lot of pantaloon-fueled flashbacks. It'll lead in to House.

Wednesday features the only sitcoms for the week, with newcomer Back to You getting paired with Til Death. Kelsey Grammer stars as a TV anchor whose fall from national prominence sees him return to his old station and his old partner - who is also his ex-wife (Patricia Heaton). Fred Williard is in the cast, too. Given the ages of the players, I have to think that Fox is looking to follow the CBS route and open its tent to all viewers... at least on Wednesdays.

Thursday is all unscripted, with Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader? leading into Kitchen Nightmares, based on the Gordon Ramsay show seen here on BBC America. I'm a fan of the original, and will be interested to see how it translates. Given the common problems of some of the restuarants on the original, I'm not sure they can provide enough variety over the course of a standard US television season. On the other hand, there are plenty of crappy restaurants out there, so we'll see.

Friday is also all unscripted, with the American Idol spin-off The Search for the Next Great American band leading into Nashville. The former show needs no explanation, given the expository title and its genesis from Idol. The latter show takes a Laguna Beach-style examination of young people trying to make it in Music City, USA. I can't say I'm interested in either of these, and I'm not sure how many people in its target audience are going to be home on Friday night to watch.

Saturday and Sunday are unchanged.

What's new for spring 2008? - a couple more new shows here.

On Wednesday, when the Idol results show gets mercifully cut down to a half-hour, we get The Return of Jezebel James as its lead-in. From the folks who brought us Gilmore Girls, it features Parker Posey and Lauren Ambrose as formerly estranged sisters brought back together when the older (Posey) asks the younger (Ambrose) to carry her baby. Good leads, and will likely be funnier than Notes from the Underbelly, though that is a very low bar.

On Thursdays we replace Kitchen Nightmares with Canterbury's Law, which is about a crusading defense attorney who will bend the rules to protect the wrongly accused. Pretty ho-hum, but it stars Julianna Marguiles and is from the folks behind Rescue Me and director Mike Figgis. So there's hope.

Once football is done, all of the comedies on Sunday move up an hour and the day ends with The Sarah Connor Chronicles, based on the Terminator movies. This is more of what I'd expect from Fox, though I'm dubious about the appeal given that it's been four years since the last (underwhelming) installment in the movie franchise. I may very well be underestimating things, though.

Oh, New Amsterdam is also scheduled to move to Fridays once American Idol comes back. This seems more likely to me than Bones being its schedule-mate.

Upfronts: The CW

Both The CW and Fox went today. I'm going to start with the netlet, as Fox's split schedule will take just a little bit more brain power to process than I have right now.

What's gone? - We knew that 7th Heaven and Gilmore Girls were gone. The axe finally fell on Veronica Mars, to the chagrin of fanboys everywhere. Reba also got the heave-ho; no last second renewal this year. All of Us also got cut, which was also expected.

What's back? - While it's not on the fall schedule, One Tree Hill will return at mid-season, and with a twist. The show will jump ahead to post-college life for the kids, which is a good way to get the characters to catch up in age with the actors. No twists or time changes for the other shows.

What's new? - Replacing All of Us on Monday is Aliens in America, where a kid trying to fit in at school is given that much more to deal with when his family takes in an exchange student from Pakistan. I have no read on this show, but I like the concept. It'll hopefully make a nice pairing with lead in Everybody Hates Chris, though being in the Monday at 8 slot cues them up to get beat by CBS's sitcoms, Deal or No Deal, and Dancing With the Stars. Thanks for nothing!

Following Beauty and the Geek on Tuesday is Reaper, which follows a teen whose parents sold his soul to the Devil, and now the kid has to do leg work for Old Scratch. This figures to be lighter in tone, given the past credits of the production team and the involvement of Kevin Smith. I do hope there's an episode where the kid gets to deliver his parents, though. That'd only be fair.

Trying to mine ratings where Veronica Mars couldn't is Gossip Girl, which will follow America's Next Top Model on Wednesday. This is apparently based on a series of books where rich Manhattan teens have their secrets outed on-line by a blogger named, you guessed it, Gossip Girl. I really have no interest in this show, but it seems perfectly matched with The CW's top-rated show.

On Sunday, things start with a couple of unscripted shows, CW Now, which is like a younger Access Hollywood, and Online Nation, which gives network time to crap you find on YouTube. They seem oddly paired with Life is Wild, a remake of a British series where a veterenarian moves his family to a South African game preserve. Depending on the tone of the show, this may be better served after a couple of sitcoms (or as the lead-in to a more mature show).

Like pretty much every other presentation so far, nothing here really excites me, but there's also nothing approaching Happy Hour territory, either.

Water Cooler Talking Points: Lost

1. Here's the plan - with the Others' invasion coming the night after next, Jack takes a group of people to see how they're going to fight back. Turns out it involves the liberal use of dynamite, brought by Rousseau from the Black Rock. Juliet will mark tents as planned, but they'll be loaded with TNT rather than potential kidnap victims.

2. Can you see what I see? - While on the show and tell trip with Jack, Desmond has more flashes. Charlie sees this and asks for details, but Desmond denies the visions. He later relents, and tells Charlie he saw Claire and Aaron getting on a helicopter to go home. Only problem is, for this to happen Charlie does have to die - he'll swim into some location, flip a switch, and drown.

3. Hey, there's just the place for that! - As an alternate rescue plan, Sayid suggests cutting off Rousseau's broadcast so he can use its frequency to call the ship that Naomi flew off from. Juliet says that won't help, as the Others have been jamming her signal from the Looking Glass - an underwater station that is flooded but can be shut off if someone swims in to shut the station down. Guess who volunteers? Before going out to the station, Charlie compiles a list of the five greatest moments in his life (the subject of this week's flashbacks): hearing Driveshaft on the radio for the first time, learning to swim, getting a family ring from his brother, saving a mugging victim and being called a hero, and meeting Claire. He writes this on a list, which he gives Desmond to bring back to Claire.

4. Change of plans - at the start of the episode we see a guy get in an outrigger and start paddling. Turns out it's Carl, who snuck back to the other island to be near Ben's daughter. When Ben returns from meeting Jacob, he says that Jacob has told him to move the attack up to that night. Ben's daughter tells Carl, and says that Carl has to warn the Lostaways, as they saved his life. Carl does this; with the new schedule, Jack and Rousseau realize they can't get the tents wired in time. Sayid suggest shooting the dynamite to set it off, and he finds shooters in Bernard and Jin. Sayid opts to stay as well, which cheeses Jack off until Sayid tells him to act like a leader and lead the group to the radio tower, where they'll wait for rescue.

5. More change of plans - Desmond and Charlie follow the cable that Hurley found out to the Looking Glass (why they just don't cut the cable I don't know). Desmond offers to take Charlie's place, thinking that perhaps that's what's supposed to happen. Charlie seems to accept this, at least until he brains Desmond with an oar. Charlie slips the list into Desmond's pocket and dives in. He barely reaches the moon pool entrance to the station, which is clearly not flooded. He gasps for air and rejoices in being alive - until two women with guns come out and draw a bead on him. So much for switch-flipping.

Most Surprising Ever?

I'll admit to being quite surprised at the Blake-Jordin final that was revealed on American Idol tonight. Melinda was barely in jeopardy all season, and as touted was the most consistent of all the performers. And even though that consistency was excellent, perhaps it got a little boring?

I do think this is the most surprising elimination ever, though I'd be interested in hearing what others think. The only one that comes to mind that's close is Tamyra Grey finishing behind Nikki McKibbin in the first season. Anyway, thoughts?

Upfronts: CBS

For a leading network, there was, as expected, not that much turnover in shows, as they Eye will debut five shows in the fall. They were the first to drop a bomb as to what wasn't coming back, so to speak.

What's gone? - starting here to note the cancellation of Jericho, which started strong but suffered in the ratings after its mid-season vacation. Whoever thought that was a good idea, especiall for serial dramas, is hopefully no longer employed in television. It's too bad the show had to suffer for the decisions of programmers; it wasn't the best show on TV, but it was a nice change from the usual CBS fare.

Also getting the heave-ho, in less surprising fashion, were The Class, Close to Home.

What's back - Rules of Engagement got picked up, and will take the 9:30 slot on Monday. Without a Trace returns to Thursday at 10, and gives its old Sunday at 10 timeslot to Shark. Both are reasonable moves, I think. Moreso than keeping Engagement.

What's New - The new comedy on Monday is The Big Bang Theory, which features two geniuses who have a hottie move in next door. Comedy ensues. I'd feel less charitable about this if it weren't airing between How I Met Your Mother and Two and a Half Men. It's also from Chuck Lorre, the producer of the latter show.

Cane features Jimmy Smits as the leader of a Miami family who is trying to protect its rum and sugar interests from family and business intrigues. It's got a pretty good cast, adding Hector Elizondo and Rita Moreno among others. Aaron Barnhart wasn't sure how this will succeed in the slot that saw Smith die an early death, but I think this show is sufficiently different that it won't go down like every heist-related program that's aired in the past year or so.

Jericho's replacement on Wednesdays is Kid Nation, where a group of minors is brought into a ghost town and given 40 days to turn it into a running community, with government, services, the works. I suppose it's more family-friendly than post-nuke Kansas, but I have no idea how this is going to work with the rest of CBS's night. Maybe it'll counter-program the dramas on other networks. Still, odd.

Replacing Close to Home on Fridays is Moonlight, which follows the adventures of a vampire-turned-detective. No word yet if they're using Angel spec scripts or just re-shooting episodes wholesale. It figures to pair well with Ghost Whisperer, though I wonder if it will be too "edgy" for the average CBS viewer and not enough so for former Angel viewers.

I'm pretty interested in how Sunday will turn out, as the venerable 60 Minutes will lead into Viva Laughlin, the US version of the British show Viva Blackpool. It's the story of a guy trying to open a casino in the face of family drama, a murder investigation, and musical numbers. Hugh Jackman has a recurring role, which seems like overkill. He needs this work? This might be a little too loopy to lead into Cold Case, but it'd be a nice change from the usual stuff that is on early Sunday nights.

The most notable mid-season replacement is Swingtown, a drama about wife-swappers in '70s era suburban Chicago. The only notable name among the cast is Grant Show. I'm not sure where this would go in the line-up, though I assume it'll either take Cane's place if that falters, or at 10 on Friday if Moonlight tanks and they move Numb3rs to 9. I can't see this show airing in any other time slot, given the subject matter.

CBS Entertainment President Nina Tassler noted that the network wanted the new shows this year to be "daring and different," and with more variety (a good thing given their reliance on procedurals). I think they've succeeded in the variety aspect, and the shows are at least different from the expected CBS standpoint. I'm not sure if they're daring, though. I will say that I'm moderately interested in Cane and Viva Laughlin, which is more interest than I've had in the new stuff that NBC and ABC is rolling out.

It Was a Hot One, Apparently

Three singers, three songs each on American Idol last night. The first round of songs saw a judge pick a song for a singer (Simon chose "Wishing on a Star" for Jordin, Paula tapped "Roxanne" for Blake, an Randy selected "I Believe in Me and You" for Melinda). The second round had the producers pick the songs, while the last round was the singer's choice. Both Jordin and Melinda went with songs they'd done before, while Blake didn't. Don't think that will matter, but it was interesting.

No real complaints, all the performances were as expected from these three. I'm not sure they were always as hot as Randy said they were (hyperbole from Randy? Never!), but no one performed poorly.

I still think we're setting up for Melinda and Jordin in the finals, but Blake and Melinda wouldn't surprise me. If Melinda somehow doesn't make it I'd be very surprised; that could be the most unexpected result in Idol history.

Water Cooler Talking Points - House

1. House 2.0 - the patient this week is a kid who, like House, is an insufferable jackass. Unlike House, the kid is suffering from cluster headaches and is prone to violence, as witnessed by his savage beating of a chess opponent. He undergoes the usual battery of tests and early misdiagnoses - and a treatment using magic mushrooms - before going into liver failure.

2. That's a new location to bleed from - later treatments lead to almost psychotic violence, during which the patient intentionally pees himself. The joke winds up being on him when his urine becomes mostly blood. Turns out his kidneys are shot, too.

3. Checkmate - after playing a game of chess with the patient in order to use stress as a diagnostic tool, House realizes that the way the patient holds his chess pieces is indicative of a missed symptom - joint and body pain that was original ascribed to the patient's history of fighting. House then comes up with the winning diagnosis, hemochromatosis. The kid will be on dialysis for the rest of his life to get the excess iron out of his blood, but will always be a jackass.

4. Don't leave on my account - Foreman has a job interview scuttled, and assumes it was House. There's a daisy chain of accusations from House to Cuddy to Wilson to Cameron to Chase back to House. Looking back, I don't think we ever sorted out who cancelled it. In any case, Cuddy offers Foreman twice his salary and a chance to head up his own, independent diagnostic unit. He turns the offer down, as he'd still be working with House.

5. Meanwhile, in the clinic - a sunburned patient comes in concerned about the pale white spots in his sunburn. House squirts him with a syringe of saline, which he then sells to the patient's son in return for the $1.41 in change the kid has. He agrees, and House then starts placing the change in the locations the kid put it on his father's body after dad fell asleep in the sun.

Upfronts: ABC

While nowhere near as dramatic as least years bevy of new shows, ABC is rolling out nine new shows for next season - actually, it's more like six new shows and three shows we've been introduced to this season. And if NBC is following Heroes into slightly nerdy territory, you can say that ABC will continue to find its softer side in the wake of Grey's Anatomy and Ugly Betty, though not nearly in as pronounced a fashion as NBC's trending.

What stayed? - ABC is returning exactly one sitcom from this year's schedule: Notes From the Underbelly, which comes back at mid-season. My LaPlaca entry thanks you. There's also some talk that According to Jim's status is up in the air, even though it wasn't on the announced schedule. Thanks again. On the plus side, I did read somewhere that Knights of Prosperity may make another short-run appearance next season. No official word today, but that'd be nice.

October Road also made the cut for next season, and like Underbelly it'll show up on Monday once Dancing With the Stars and The Bachelor wrap their fall seasons.

The other returning shows were picked up early, and the only notable things are the January 2008 return for Lost and Men in Trees getting stuck on Friday's at 8... which seems too early for a romantic dramedy.

What's gone - as I noted above, it was a hard year to be an ABC sitcom, as they mostly got the axe. For dramas, nothing came back from hiatus, so don't expect to ever learn what happened to The Nine or what the hell was in that box on Six Degrees.

What's new? - We'll take this day by day, as most weeknights have at least one new show.

On Monday, the sitcom Sam I Am will give a buffer between Dancing With the Stars and The Bachelor for the fall, and then pair with Underbelly between Wife Swap and October Road for the spring. The show stars Christina Applegate as a woman who has come out of a coma and doesn't remember any of her life. ABC's aired worse, and it may appeal to folks who enjoy the Ava story line on Grey's Anatomy.

Tuesday brings two new sitcoms. One, Carpoolers, is about four people who share rides to and from work. Woo. The other may be the season's most talked-about sitcom debut, Cavemen. Yes, it's the show spun off from the Geico cavemen ads. I don't know if they can sustain a season on this premise, but I'll be watching. If it works, expect NBC to work up something about the heroics of the Aflac duck for mid-season.

The most changes come on Wednesday, where ABC will run three new dramas until Lost returns to take the place of whichever one tanks. Pushing Daisies is about a guy whose touch can revive the dead. This leads out into Private Practice, the Grey's spin-off, which is then followed by Dirty Sexy Money, which stars Peter Krause as a lawyer who is trying to keep out of his family firm's intrigues, but without success.

This night gives us our first battle for next season, as Practice will air opposite The Bionic Woman. It'll be interesting to see what the other networks put up here. As far as the other two shows go, Daisies is the more interesting premise, but I'd expect Money to do better given the time slot.

Thursday puts men into the mix with Big Shots, which gets the post Grey's slot. It follows four high-ranking executives and their crappy home lives. Good cast, I think - Michael Vartan, Christopher Titus, Joshua Malina, and Dylan McDermott. It'll be interesting to see if it can finally slay the dragon that is ER.

Friday's 9pm show is Women's Murder Club, which comes from a couple of writers from The Shield, which suggests promise. It's based on James Patterson's novels, which will bring some level of pre-developed fandom. They could do worse here, and at least it makes Men in Trees at 8 seem a little more sensible.

There are also some other mid-season shows out there, including:

Cashmere Mafia - yet another Sex and the City clone.
Eli Stone - where the title character has a brain aneurysm that may or may not be behind his newfound desire not to screw the little guy.
Miss/Guided - High school repeats itself as an unpopular girl returns to her alma mater as guidance counselor, but finds herself thwarted by a popular cheerleader who has returned to be an English teacher. It's like a more realistic Ed!

Overall... I'm not sure. Things seem to make sense when on the page, but it's really going to depend on ABC delivering solid programming and promoting it appropriately. Neither task is exactly in their wheelhouse. And I can't say that I'm dying to see any of these shows. I'm also not sure why The Bachelor is still around, though there must be some sort of highly selective, well-monied demographic behind it. The schedule is probably enough to keep NBC in fourth, but not enough to move ABC up.

Upfronts: NBC

It's that time of year when the networks bring in the advertisers to unveil their schedules for the 2007-08 season, hoping that they'll pre-sell as much of their ad time as possible. First up this year is NBC, who is looking to improve on their impending fourth place finish for the season.

What's Back>? - you probably heard that Friday Night Lights is back, and that Law & Order worked out a last-minute deal. Lights will actually move to Friday - good luck - while L&O moves to Sundays, while L&O: Criminal Intent moves to USA, with reruns on NBC Saturday nights. Scrubs is back, which is somewhat surprising. I should be less surprised that Medium is back, but given the way NBC has mishandled the show a renewal is the least they could do. Las Vegas is also back, for reasons I cannot comprehend.

Odder still, the more family-friendly Lights is on at 10, and is preceded by Las Vegas. Wouldn't it make more sense to have the shows swap time slots?

Oh, we're also getting 30 episodes of The Office, including a few that are an hour long. That doesn't suck at all.

What's Gone? - Crossing Jordan got the boot, and The Apprentice was fired, though it may get rehired elsewhere. A bunch of the new stuff, from Studio 60 to the mid-season shows, also got the axe.

What's New? - not surprisingly given the breakout of Heroes, many of the new shows for next season have a sci-fi or fantasy bend to them. They include:

Journeyman, about a San Francisco newsman who starts traveling through time for some reason. It's tabbed as a "romantic-mystery" from NBC, so I'm thinking it'll be a cross between Love, American Style and Quantum Leap. It gets the post-Heroes slot on Monday, so it has a chance.

Chuck, a comedic spy thriller about a computer geek who becomes a secret agent after he manages to download confidential government data into his brain. I suppose a live action Freakazoid is too much to ask, but this seems pretty close. It's on Tuesdays, stuck between The Biggest Loser and L&O: SVU. This does not seem like a good fit.

Bionic Woman, a remake of the Lindsay Wagner vehicle starring Michelle Ryan (known to you, if at all, from her time on EastEnders. This airs on Wednesday after the second appearance of Deal or No Deal for the week. It is followed by Life, a drama about a cop who rejoins the force after being imprisoned for a crime he did not commit.

Heroes: Origins, is a prequel to the current show, which will introduce some new characters. It's touted as a "supplement" to the original show, so look for it to help bridge the gap from the mini-hiatuses the show took this season to ratings-eroding effect.

I'm tempted to include Lipstick Jungle as a sci-fi themed show as it's another attempt to clone Sex in the City, even using Candace Bushnell source material. It'll debut in January 2008 once football is gone, and I don't think well of its prospects given that it'll have Dateline, L&O, and Medium as its lead-ins.

And then there's The Singing Bee which will trade off with 1 vs. 100 on Friday nights. It's a singing show that sees how well people remember song lyrics, both with the music and without. Seems more like horror than sci-fi, really.

Not yet scheduled is an American version of The IT Crowd, a comedy about technical workers (dust off those Dweebs scripts!) and "minisodes" from Jerry Seinfeld about making Bee Movie. My guess is that they'll use the Seinfeld material to fill gaps during the week and during Sunday night football broadcasts.

I suppose there's some sense to all the sci-fi related shows, as it's a niche that doesn't get a lot of air on network TV and NBC can always spin shows to the Sci Fi Channel for reruns or first runs if they don't do so well in prime time. There may be too much for the average viewer, though, and I think it'll show with Journeyman and/or Chuck. I'm imagining a big push for The Bionic Woman, which could wind up facing off against Lost if ABC puts it back into its original time slot.

All in all, I don't think this is the line-up that's going to bring NBC out of fourth place.

Water Cooler Talking Points - Lost

1. Where "Happy" and "Birthday" do not coexist - Flashbacks this week for Ben, who we learn was not born on the island, but outside of Portland as a preemie while his folks were on a hike. His mom dies after delivery, while one of the people who pull over to help Ben and his folks eventually gets Ben's dad a job on the island as a "work man," much to dad's dismay. He basically becomes a drunken lout, and blames Ben for killing his mom on one of his younger birthdays.

2. But she still looks good - This leads young Ben to run away, and as he's out on the sonic fence line, he sees his mom on the other side (this after briefly seeing her outside his bedroom window on a previous night). He goes to run across, but she tells him not to, that it's not his time. Ben returns on a later day with the codes to shut down the fence, where he crosses and meets a mysterious stranger (who we now know as Richard) who is one of the "hostiles."

3. Wait - there were other Others? - Apparently so, as this group of "hostiles" occasionally attacks the Dharma compound and workers. Young Ben asks the stranger if he can join, but Ben is told that it may take some time. Flash forward to an older Ben, now a work man himself, who (again on a birthday) joins his dad while making a delivery. The dad seems somewhat contrite about being an ass, and promises to try to remember Ben's birthday in the future. Ben says that's not going to happen, and he kills his dad with a canister of gas. Turns out that the rest of the people in the Dharma compound are killed the same way, thanks to the Hostiles, who meet up with Ben there afterwards. At least now know where he got the fratracidal task he gave to Locke and the faux gas plan when they bugged out.

4. And the Dharmites may have company - Speaking of Locke, he and present Ben go to see Jacob, who Ben claims he answers to (but not after Locke gets to give Mikhail a nice beat down when he questions Ben taking Locke to see Jacob). They get there, and Ben starts talking to an empty chair. Locke figures this is a joke or Ben is cracked, and he goes to leave. A non-Ben voice says "help me" to Locke, and he turns around. He argues with Ben, and turns on his flashlight. But Jacob doesn't like flashlights, and there's sudden chaos. Locke leaves, and Ben follows. On the way back to the Others' camp, Ben takes Locke by a pit which contains the bodies of the gassed Dharma folks, to show Locke where he came from. Ben then adds Locke to the pit by shooting him, and then asking Locke what Jacob said. Locke eventually tells him, and Ben leaves Locke to die.

Oh, Ben also talks about how either the "hostiles" or the Dharma folks had to be wiped out, as they couldn't live together. Another paralell to our current situation.

5. Meanwhile, back on the beach - Sawyer is back, and he plays the tape for Sayid, who plays it for Kate, and so on until a mutiny is brewing. When Jack and Juliet return they are beset by angry beach-dwellers. Juliet has them play the other side of the tape, which details the plot to take Sun. But it turns out Jack and Juliet have been planning for the Others' arrival, though the details aren't given. It suggests resistance. We'll see.